The Glass House of Nicolerene

Overwhelmed... maybe a bit... so please excuse my rambling

Dear who ever is listening, 

I am here and feeling somewhat overwhelmed. I am so behind on so many things because Ben has been working away from home for over a year and now that he has been working near home I am trying to play catch up and spend some time with him. I am overwhelmed with getting pictures from Ella's beautiful birthday together. I have some on my phone and some on the camera and really I did not take any myself.. maybe like 4...It means I have to sit down and focus and that's been hard. Ella has me on my toes. She is a climber. She also figured out how to move the pack and play that I use to block off the playroom so she would be confined in here with me..( my desk is in a corner of the playroom ) and its not really a spot that a baby gate would work. She is such fun though. I am loving every moment with this little girl. She gets my heart worked up all day long with all her cuteness and love. She is a very very loving little girl, who likes to give kisses and hugs and if you are really lucky she might just tell you she loves you. This little girl LOVES books. She is always walking around with a book and she will just plop right down somewhere and open it up and start checking it out. She tried to walk through Goodwill yesterday while reading. She is just so darn cute!!! The big kids finished school this past week and are with their Dad for 4 weeks... I think I just might die being away from them for that long with no visit!!! As much as Ella is melting my heart there is a huge hole in it when I am away from the older ones. They are still my babies even though Kyle is going to be the big TEN on the 30th. I can not believe that!!! He was just born... Kyle is my special boy. With all of these girls and him being the only boy its a special thing we have. Since he will not be with me this year for his birthday I am going to send him a "party in a box". I did this with Austin last year since she was with her dad. I will make cupcakes in jars so they stay nice and fresh and put a ton of confetti and other birthday treats in a box and mail it to him so it arrives right on his birthday. Then we will get on skype when he opens it and we will wear party hats and eat cake together. Its the next best thing. Before skype I will get some balloons up and a happy birthday banner so it will be decorated around me when he sees me. Then as soon as they come back we have a special day planned for Kyle and his friend. So when my heart is broken when I am away from my babies on their birthday I try to have something planned for them that I get excited about to keep me positive but it is probably the hardest thing ever to be away from them on birthdays but fair is fair... even though I don't think its fair because I gave birth... but that's the life of divorced parents. Then there is my computer. It is about to die. I am working on getting my pictures moved over to a hard drive but that's years of pictures and it takes a long time so I am doing it in small batches but I still have some that I have not organized into the right folders and yes I am OCD with my pictures and my folder system I have them in, but hey we all have our things. I am afraid to even turn my computer on and its so hard to use because its so slow and old and just well broken. What should take me 10 minutes to do takes me a half an hour and things like opening a page can take ten minutes if it even works. I need a new one but I do not see that happening in the near future so I am trying to be nice to this thing. We also are trying to finish projects at the house. I have told you before about the half finished this and the half finished that well we are starting to finish things. The kitchen did get painted before the birthday party.. GO US!!! We do have some more work in there though. There is this horrible back splash that we are going to take down but then we have to fix the wall and find some new tile. Our bathroom that has been holding until after Easter and the party is back in full swing. My Uncle did the tile in the shower and now we have to finish the rest. Ben took the toilet out tonight and after over a month of debating, we are going to change the tile on the floor to match the new shower. We were not planning on it since removing tile is one b%#@h of a job but since Ben is home a lot more right now we figured we will go ahead and take the plunge and do it and this allows us to use a bathroom vanity that we have at our other house that we like instead of buying a new one. So it will be a bit more work but it will be worth it when its done and it will save money. Now I just have to keep Ben reminded of all this when he is in there taking this tile up. I need to have some more serious yard sales as well. We finally got some stuff listed for sale on craigslist and I hope to start emptying things out. We are still going to be moving when the other house sells so we have got to get rid of this stuff. There is no way we would be able to move with all of this. Saving so much has helped me a lot of times... just with Ella, most of her clothes and toys are things that I saved from the older kids but my garage is just out of hand with stuff. I also would like to make some room in there for the kids to be able to use it to play in this summer. We have an almost finished garage so we have AC, flooring and finished walls out there and the people before built a little stage and I think the kids would have fun if the girls could play school and have music bands and Kyle could put up the pool table for him and his bud. So even though I have lots of motivation, I walk out there and become instantly so overwhelmed. Hopefully my want to make it a nice space will help me out in the next few weeks before the kids get back and we can get this going. I will feel like a million pounds are off my shoulders when its done. We have more work in the yard as well but we did get a huge project out back done before the party. Ben finished my landscaping around our porch and I LOVE IT!! So yes we are getting things done but as always there are a million more adding up and a million other stresses with moving and Ben's work and future school and of course the big one... MONEY... but we keep going and moving along and I am trying to focus on the pretty things to keep a smile on my face. So much of our future is unclear right now and in other people hands and that is so hard but I am keeping my fingers crossed that in the next few months things work out. 

I hope life is going well for everyone else out there. I hope the stress is low. 

Have a wonderful week!!!

Yours Truly, 

_{P.S If my computer stays alive there will be some upcoming posts about pancakes, jam, our dolphin pictures and of course a little girls birthday party...} 

_{P.P.S I know I am overwhelmed a lot but hey thats life...right?}

 

 

Bubbles, Swings and I love you's...

HI

I had a sweet little afternoon with Miss Ella. 

After Ella's nap she had a snack and we went outback. It was beautiful out. Not to hot and not raining. It has been raining a lot. So we filled up the bubble machine and caught bubbles and then we went to swing on Ella's new swing she got for her birthday. It was absolutely wonderful.

I love peaceful moments.

In BIG news!!! This morning when we called daddy at work I told Ella to say I love you just like I do every day but today she actually said I love you. It was the cutest thing in the world EVER!!! Our hearts just melted. 

 

Also...

Be sure to check out Tea Collection's page and vote for your favorite girl dresses and/or boys tops. Once an item has received 1,000 Facebook Likes, it will go on sale--$15 dresses and $10 boys tops! It's so much fun! Vote for your favorite girls dresses  and boys tops to be sure that your favorites go on sale. Happy Liking! 

 

Have a super day!!!

a happy little tune...

I just can’t help but enjoy a happy little tune. One of those songs that makes you smile and feel like you should have little bluebirds flying around with you. During the day Ella and I keep the music going and I just love this song. This week has been very rough and stressful and as down as I have been I was still able to dance around with Ella today as we listened to this. (we have a lot of big changes coming up and I am just not ready for them.. more to come soon)

With all the music playing Ella is becoming quite the little dancer. It is so so so absolutely adorable. Music is a HUGE part of my life so it really makes me happy when the kids are enjoying some good tunes.  

So enjoy the little tune and I hope you get it stuck in your head for the day. 

 

 

 

Also, one of my favorite stores, Tea Collection has been awarded with the 2012 "Stylish Tot" Cribsie Award!  Visit Tea Collection today and view their new summer collection. I am in love with tons of adorable baby clothes and I hope to be getting a few for Ella soon.  Enjoy! 

 

Have a beautiful Thursday!!!!

A rainy morning blog post...

_{(turned afternoon due to computer problems...)}

 

To the beach we go...

Last night I went back to the beach. It was really nice to go with Ben and walk around and take some pictures and let Ella play in the water for a little bit. I really enjoy how beautiful and peaceful it is there. Every time I go though there is more and more and more trash and it really gets me going. I am sure Ben is annoyed with my complaining over and over about people leaving their trash and ruining such a beautiful place... or any place. I know he agrees and feels the same way but I tend to get all wound up over it. 

After the beach we went out for dessert. We have a place that we go to just for the Crème Brûlée.  Its always fun to go there. They close early so we go there and then to dinner.

 Hey, everyone needs some dessert before dinner sometimes :)

After that we came home, watched a show while I nursed Ella to sleep and we called it a night. I woke up to an amazing thunderstorm early this morning and I am just enjoying it for a bit before I get to chores. 

 

 

I hope everyone has a beautiful weekend... Even if it's raining :)

 

My weekend...

I was able to get and keep my house clean... Bathroom construction was moving along... I made some more candles for my Mom... I was able to finish 2 craft projects I have been slowly working on... I started a new one... I made lemon cheesecake for Ben... My laundry basket was happy... 

and...

I hit a vintage goldmine when we noticed that the house behind us that has been empty for a while was being cleaned out. All of a sudden all of this awesome stuff is being brought out into the backyard and I am in my house drooling. So Ben went over and made some small talk and I walk away with some pretty cool items. I was promised an amazing vintage patio set but the guy sold it an hour after he said it was mine... I was very upset this morning when I found out. I was steaming mad. In the end the guy was able to get me back one of the pieces. I am very excited about my new things and I can not wait to take some pictures and share...

But for now, I am going to bed. It is super late and I am tired. 

I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend... 

XOXOXOXOXOXO

Nicole

_{I leave you with some lemon cheesecake :)}

 

 

Day by Day...

Hi Hi Hi

Another busy week moving right along. Okay, when is it not busy around here. I always have 5 million things going on at once, but I guess I would get bored if I didn't. I DID IT!!! Yep I had my yard sale on Sat morning. I did not want to. I am not a people person at all so I rather scrub toilets at a bar then go out and deal with people at a yard sale. ( ok ok yes that is to some degree an exaggeration but it makes my point... I DO NOT LIKE TO DEAL WITH PEOPLE ) So when the alarm went off Sat morning I wanted to pull the covers over my head and say NO NO NO I AM NOT DOING IT but I got up like a big girl and went and did it. My sister came to help me and my mom came to help me with Ella. ( Ben had a mid-term for school so he was in study land ) In the end... I did it, and if the weather allows I will do it again next weekend. We did not get rich but it was not the worst sale I have had and I got some stuff moved out of my garage and into someone else's. 

Then Sunday came... and I spent the entire day in Lowe's and I am never ever going back... no that was not me at Home Depot last night... that was just someone pretending to be me... I swear. We bought almost everything we needed to do the bathroom and it was long and I had to think a lot about matching tile to this and stain to this and light fixtures and hardware and how will this look and this and that. UGHH, it starts out fun but by the end of the day its like LETS GO NOW!!!

Other then that its just been daily life around here. I looked around after the yard sale and discovered that my house was a wreck, so I have been cleaning and doing a little of this and a little of that. I am trying to start some basic planning for Easter and Ella's first birthday. I do not want to plan for her birthday yet but if I do not start now I will become overwhelmed at the last min and nothing will work right. We are going to have Easter in the Keys since it is part of the kids spring break. I do not know why but I love making a big deal for Easter. Last year we had a scavenger hunt for the kids that my sister in law put together and it was AWESOME!!! The kids loved it and everyone got a good laugh when I hid in a closet and got stuck because of my huge pregnant belly. It's going to be Ella's first Easter and I think she is at a great age to enjoy it. I still have Chesney's dress from her first Easter and I think Ella is going to wear it. I went to a thrift store yesterday that I had never been to and it ended up being a good one. I found some super cute things and my wallet and I both left happy. 

 1) Miss Serious... 2) Sleeping Beauty... 3) A thrifty pot... 4) Little baby finds... 5) A candle I made for my Mama...  6) Drain work... 7) A fixed drain... 8) Just a hole in the ceiling

 

So for now its just life day by day. There are a million things going on but everything is running smooth at the moment. 

Hope everyone is doing well...

Nicole

A bathroom re-model and a yard sale...

Hi... ahhh... what a mess we have over here at our little house. There is no turning back now. We have started demo on the master bath today. I can't believe it really happened, that this day is here. I bought my house 2 and a half years ago when I was still on my own. It was not the best house but for a single mama of 3 kids, it was PERFECT. Well its not so perfect anymore and it keeps getting smaller and smaller and smaller. I bought the house knowing that it needed new bathrooms, flooring, and a kitchen. The house did have a newer roof and AC unit and those things as a single parent are much more important then the pretty kitchen and bath that we all want to have. So here we are down the road a bit and since we are not rolling in extra money at any time we are just now getting to bathroom numero uno. 

_{At this time I want to thank my Mom and my Aunt and Uncle for helping with this project. Without you guys this would not be happening. We have had a lot of CRAP in our lives the past few years and without our family we would not have made it through. So a BIG GIANT thanks to ALL of our family who has helped support us through all the hard times.} 

So my Uncle has come down from Ohio for a few weeks to help us out and I think that is pretty AWESOME!!!! The other GREAT thing is that Ben gets to work out of the local office for the rest of the week so we have him home tomorrow and Friday like a normal 8-5 kind of husband. WOOOO-HOOOO!!!! Of course I put him to work on the bathroom and the rest of my very long "honey do list". He is a champ and between work and school work he does amazing to try to get as much scratched of that list of mine. Well now that the shower is completely gutted out we need to pick out tile to replace it... I know, I should have done this already but...... this is the hard part. See I picked out tile for the bathroom when I bought the house but we will be moving soon so I need to find a lower priced look. I do not want anything crazy expensive but it was definitely out of the budget for this project. And why spend all the extra for what you really want when you are not even going to be living in the house. The object here is to make the bathroom nice for when it gets rented out. I need to find the tile and then we are going to refinish the cabinets we already have and make them look like new, put some fresh paint on the walls and then there will be an updated bathroom and that will make a happy homeowner and future tenant.  

And...

I want to have a yard sale Saturday. I hate having yard sales. I used to love doing it. When I lived in GA yard sales were money makers. Every time I have had one in Florida... well... they just SUCK. I always put so much work into it and then make nothing. I hope that this house has good traffic. My signs are made  and I am trying to get together the easy stuff. ( Ben has a mid -term Sat morning and wont be around to help me pull this one off. ) I am just going to pull out the big stuff and the easy to price stuff. I hate pricing... UGH its horrible. I am trying to keep myself excited about it and not become overwhelmed because we need to sell all of this stuff. I am not moving it... I will not, I can not... So I have my fingers crossed and lets see if I can pull this one off.

Oh....... did I mention that I am NOT a morning person at all... HELP...

 

 

Here are a few pics I snapped of the bathroom today, and one of Ella when she got into Mama's ribbon basket. :)

 

 

I sure hope everyone is having a great week!!!! 

Nicole

Some pictures...

from the weekend...

_{There are a few pictures on here that Kyle took. He was really enjoing the camera this weekend and I was so proud!!!}

I hope all is well for everyone...

XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Nicole

 

^{* Flashback Friday will return this Friday...} 

What I have been doing...

HI

I can't believe it is already Wednesday. The days are flying by. The weekend came and went so fast. I could not believe it when I sat there Sunday night asking myself if it was really over. Everyday has just been so busy. 

 

So our weekend... well it started great. My cousin and her friend arrived Friday night and we had chinese food and hung out and everything was great. Then I woke up in the morning and discovered that my cousin was SICK. Oh was she sick. Poor Cara was laid out on the couch as the weekend sped by. Ben and I went to get the new piano.. finally. I LOVE IT!!! Its home and even though it needs me to fix the paint on it (eventually I would love to strip the paint that some moron in the past 80 years painted it with, it was once orange and then painted black, it has beautiful wood underneath that, so one day it will happen, like when my kids are grown up and I have that kind of time on my hands) it looks amazing. And Ella loves it!!! She would play the other one with Ben but she LOVES this one. She crawls over to it and stands there waiting for you to come pick her up and sit her on the bench to play. She can just reach the edge of a few keys so she will try to play herself. And if you play it, she will stand there and dance. She gave her grandma's a great laugh the other night as she showed off her new moves. By Sunday afternoon Cara and Sam had to get ready to leave but we headed over to the beach for some pizza. Then the girls hit the road and the weekend was... sadly over. 

 

Monday______________________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________ Oh Monday how I hated you!!!!! You chewed me up and spit me out this week. There is no other way to put it... Monday sucked this week. It hit my like a truck. I had a very hard time letting Ben leave this week. I just could not do it. I cried... I acted like a baby and felt like I was going to die when he walked out the door. I know... grow up Nicole... but every once in a while I get a week like that. Hell, I am only human and I just want my husband home... Is that really so much to ask?? In my past life I was an Army wife. I have done my time with deployments and all the other separation time that comes with that life. I did it, I got the t-shirt and then I burned that baby!!! I guess its just not in my cards to have a husband at home with me. Maybe one day... a girl can dream... right? 

So lets move on... Good bye Monday, Hello Tuesday... 

 

Well when I went to bed Monday I had my head set that I was going to go to sleep and wake up Tuesday and all the horrible would be gone and it would be all rainbows and sunshine for me... Ya well I was wrong... I woke up feeling like death. Now it was not related to my love being away... it was this stupid cold that I have been fighting for a month. Seriously... a month. I got sick on Jan 30th... and I can not get rid of it. (do not ask how I remember that date but I do) Ella was the best baby ever though and she played in her crib next to my bed while I got a little extra nap and then I woke up feeling much better. Things were looking up... so I forced my butt out of the house and into the thrift store! That helped a lot. I found a few things and my bill was $8.80. GO ME!!! That's the kind of shopping I like. I had my favorite pasta for dinner and tried to help my Mr. with his speech homework but I do not think I was much help last night. I hope I cheered him up a bit when I suggested to turn it into a rap. Hey I tried to make him smile... So the day turned out to be pretty good. 

 

 

Those are a few of my favorite Ella moments from the weekend. I am just hanging out this Wednesday doing chores and planning for this weekend. Its my weekend with the older munchkins so lets see what kind of fun we can get into. No matter how bad the day can be at least I have my munchkins and my husband (well a long distance husband :) ). I love my family through all the GOOD and the BAD. We can only work hard and the GOOD things will happen. 

I hope everyone else is having a great week!!!

Thanks for reading...

Nicole

As I write this... I got up to change the laundry, cause well, that's my job around here, and I walked into WATER... yep water... and it was well, you know leaking from my WASHER!!! Really??? This is not the day, the week or the year for this. So of course I called the Mr. down in the Keys and broke the wonderful news. I dried up all the water, moved everything into the hallway and put another load in. So my house is now a wreck... again. As soon as I am done with this post I get to go and check the status of my swimming pool... uh, I mean laundry room. Whoever is dealing the cards, can you please reshuffle before the next hand? 

 

 

 

A little update on Ella...

 

It was less then a month ago that I sat here typing a post, excited about how well Ella's doctors appointment had gone and how things were looking up for this pretty baby girl of mine. Well here I am again to give a little update as my little baby sleeps next to me. 

Let me go back to her last appointment first. Everything had gone well but I did notice that her weight seemed low compared to her 7 month check up. So I scheduled a weight check at her pediatricians office so we could get her weighed on her normal scale and well that scale said she had not gained much either. So I spoke with her doctor and he said to just make sure she was eating lots of baby food and to keep a food log the week before her 9 month check up that was coming up. Well here we are a few weeks later and Ella went in for her check up on Monday. She had not gained anymore weight. Since December 12th, Ella has only gained 9 ounces and has reached a plateau. I was so anxious for this appointment because I was pretty sure she had gained something. She eats very well and nurses plenty, but no, nothing.  So now there is reason to be concerned. The doctor does not seem to think this is in relation to Ella's liver issues because those levels are improving. Now this may be nothing. It could just be that I am not making enough milk but I do not think that is it. I nursed Chesney for 8 months and I do not feel as though something is wrong with that. I have something to compare to so I feel like I would be able to tell a difference of something was wrong. And I am not going to lie... hearing that I may not be able to give my child what she needs is not cool at all. It is a horrible, no good feeling. I am in for the long haul with nursing this little girl. ( I was cut short on nursing Chesney at 8 months because of my medical problems and I have been set that this time nothing was stopping me. ) So if it is me then as much as I do not like it, the problem should be easy to fix. But while it might just be no big deal we need to rule out other possibilities. Ella went today to have a TON of blood work and a X-ray of her wrist so they can look at the bone age. I felt so bad today making this precious girl go through being stuck again. She did so well but its so sad that she is getting used to this. The doctor is trying to rule out any issues including Thyroid problems and some Autoimmune diseases. All of my girls are at higher risk for Thyroid problems because I have them, but I also have Hashimoto's. This puts Ella at higher risk for other Autoimmune diseases. 

I know that this is probally nothing and probally just me not making enough milk... but... I can not help but freak out. I do not want her to have any health issues. No mother wants their children to have anything wrong, but to know that she could and that its because of me that she is even at risk for this stuff, SUCKS!!!! I have been so worried about this since my diagnosis during my pregnancy. 

All the tests are done and now we wait for the results. We have an appointment scheduled for a weight check the week after next. I am nursing more and filling this baby up with lots and lots of food. And in the meantime we wait... and I do my best not to freak out. I am a person who plans for the worst and hopes for the best so there is nothing I can do over the upcoming days to stop from freaking out. This baby does not deserve anything bad, no baby does...

Here are some pictures of Ella playing today. I love that even though she had an afternoon of tests, that she is still such a happy baby. Keep smiling my baby Ella. We love you. 

 

I hope everyone is having a good week. I am going to do my best to keep my chin up. Everyone else around here is doing great. Happy kids... Happy Mama...

For now its time to get some sleep. 

Thanks for reading...

Nicole